World Javelin Record attempt by Jon Wilkinson (written by Ron ‘funny man’ Stones)

On 5th June 1993 in our home Northern men’s league match at Spenborough, Jon Wilkinson will attempt a world record in the javelin. The current WR of 91.46 by Steve Backley is well within his reach.

To help Jon the club has been rallying round members & supporters to turn up and provide vocal & physical assistance. Two groups of helpers are needed, one group is to gather outside the fence in line with the start of the run up. The other group will be at the opposite end of the stadium – again outside the fence (we do not want to get Jon disqualified). The first group will be organised by ‘Big Pete’ Crampton (the blowers). The second group at the far side will be the suckers.

The idea is that when Jon releases his spear, the two groups will ‘explode’ into action and cause a movement of air that will carry the javelin those few extra meters needed to create a new World Record !.

Leading up to the big day, Pete’s group which includes other sprinters and some of his big meaty rugby mates will be in strict training culminating, so I’ve heard , with extra portions of beans, gassy ‘pop’ and lashings of boiled egg on the eve of the competition. This will create extra ‘puff’ by way of ‘farting’ and ‘belching’ to blast the javelin on its way.

The other group, as yet without a leader, is a little less organised and in fact is one or two members short . We actually need the same number of suckers as blowers in order to set up an equilibrium. If you wish to become a sucker, would you please contact Jon as soon as possible.